My fiance and I have been together for almost 13 years. However, it was only last month that our parents met each other. It was a day I had wondered about for years. I even thought about it more 5 months ago when we started diving into the planning phase.
Part of me was excited. This was a pretty big deal. The thought of two families coming together after more than one decade was a dream come true.
Then there was that other part — dread. Our parents are very different (I think). Not to sound mean, but it’s like the Bundys versus the Bradys. Care to venture a guess at which family I come from?
It is an extreme comparison, but it is kind of how I feel, in the most exagerrated sense. My parents see the world based on TV. Basically, don’t go online because your identity will get stolen and don’t have a social life because you’re inevitably going to have sex with anything that moves.
In addition, my parents don’t have a censor, particularly my mom. In one recent incident, we were attending a neighbor’s party. My mom told the neighbor, “We’re just going to eat, then run.” I do think there’s a nicer way to state that you came mainly for the food but had no intentions of staying long.
I think we stopped eating together as a family by the time I was like 6. Everyone would grab their plate and take their place in front of the TV in the family room or living room.
We didn’t go to church. My mom, who was raised Catholic, had a bad incident occur and she seemed to lose some faith in it (although she does occasionally go to prayer meetings). My dad had a different upbringing, and so church wasn’t even an option.
Talking to each other today seems non-existent. It’s like my mom prepares the food, makes sure everyone is eating, then escapes to a different room.
In a nutshell, my fiance’s parents are different. When we go over there, we all eat together and there’s always conversations going. His parents still go to church, which I think is cool. While I have no desire to go to church (mainly because I’ve only gone to mass once), I think it’s nice that they have routine and faith.
Both his parents are pretty Internet savvy, and not afraid of it like my parents are. Although now that I think about it, maybe it’s a good thing that my parents don’t know how to log in to Facebook and other social media sites. Even better, they cannot read this blog! 🙂
I digress. So, we all had lunch at the hotel where our wedding will take place. My parents and I sat on one side, and my fiance and his parents sat on the other side. My parents were dressed very casual and his parents were dressed nice.
As expected, the moms seemed to do more talking. My dad seemed to clam up (this is where i get my quietness from) and my fiance’s dad would speak once in a while, although sometimes so low that my parents couldn’t hear.
Me, I just sat and stared down at my plate, hoping my parents wouldn’t say anything embarrassing. Also, I was hoping my fiance’s parents wouldn’t say something nice about me, and then my mom would somehow turn it around and say, “Really? Are you talking about my daughter?”
None of that happened. It was actually a very good meeting. The food was good, my mom managed to not belch at the table, and everyone seemed excited to see the venue.
It was a good day overall. I was so happy that the nightmare that could’ve been turned out so much better than I expected.